It has been quite a while since you have been thinking of calling it quits, but for some reason you are finding yourself to linger on. People realize that their relationship is over long before they actually end it. Then why is it that it takes so much time to do what is necessary? There are many answers to this question.
A person may keep on being in an already over relationship for various reasons, it may be that you are not yet ready to accept the truth. It really hurts to end a relationship that once made you so happy or you may have been misinterpreting your partner all along and could not make out that he was not that serious from the beginning. Many people create alternate realities in their mind that they are still happy in the relationship and finally there is the grand reason of being afraid to be alone. Whatever be your reason, the sooner you come to terms with the state of your relationship, the better chances for you to end it with less complications and bitterness.
Ups and downs are common in every relationship, so it does not mean that each time a relationship hits a rough patch you move on to the next guy. You don’t break up with someone for trivial reasons. It is well known that the sparks which fly at the beginning, eventually dims down afterwards, it is not an acceptable reason for ending things up with a guy who is compatible with you on every level just because you miss the feeling of the first kiss, the first date etc. There should be a legitimate reason for the breakup. When you know that you are doing it for the right reasons it will also give you courage to execute the decision.
The loud and clear signs that it is over:
- You don’t make each other happy anymore: Given the fact that after sometime the clouds of infatuation do drift apart, it becomes apparent whether you actually were compatible with each other or not. If you are finding yourself to be looking back in the past, when the chemistry was intense and all you could think about was your partner, while now you cannot stand each other than the truth is, it was just a mere attraction to begin with.
- You are putting more effort than him or her: Is the relationship only continuing because you are the only person who is making it work? If he/she is not showing any interest it is the clearest sign that they are over you.
- You are being taken for granted: It is heartbreaking when you love someone so much, but all he or she cares about is their work and their interests. If you are always the 2nd choice after work, friends and hobbies, do you really would want to be treated that way for the rest of your life? If you are not being appreciated and made to feel special, then that person surely doesn’t deserve you.
- Less talking and more arguing: Communication has become a huge problem for you two. Whenever, you have something important to discuss, misunderstandings come in the way and the conversation ends with the two of you screaming at top of your voice or ends in tears.
- They want you to change: This is an absolute no-no. A few minor things can always be adjusted, but when you give in to these wishes, they will continue to demand more. Until you get transformed into somebody, you don’t even recognize any more. If a person loves you he/she will accept the way you are.
- Strong attachment to your money: There is a new kind of fraud now-a-days and they are worse than the generic frauds, they disguise themselves as lover, while the sole purpose of the relationship from the beginning was to extract money. Do not continue this parasitic relationship.
- You are constantly made to feel inferior: Your significant other may be quite a catch with their good looks, intelligence and wealth, but these do not give him/her the permission to behave with you in a snobbish manner. A condescending attitude is just something no person with self-respect should put up with.
- Extreme possessive nature: A little possessiveness and jealousy are alright, but you should keep a check whether it is going out of limit. An extreme case of possessiveness looks something like this- calling every hour to know about your whereabouts, getting angry even when you hang out with your cousins (of opposite gender) or you are expected only to dress and talk in a manner acceptable to your partner. Run away from such situations as fast as possible! You are a person, not a plaything!
- Your partner is abusive: If there ever has been an incident where he/she has physically hit you, it can be as minor as a slap, but still you should seriously consider ending it without waiting around for the slap to progress to a beating.